Happy Tuesday, you fine people. I have just returned from a girls' trip to Savannah, Georgia.
A real girls' trip - not the kind Dianna Russini takes, where there are no girls but there is a married NFL head coach. It was a great time celebrating one of my high school best friends, who never got to have a bachelorette party because her original one was canceled (thanks, COVID rules) in 2020.
Except now we're all old and married so instead of a bachelorette, we called it a "wives party."
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On Saturday, we signed up for a walking history tour. Unfortunately, it poured down rain the entire time. But like the U.S. Postal Service, we persisted. And I'm glad we did.
In all seriousness, if you like to nerd out a little bit, you need to check out Genteel & Bard's Savannah History Walking Tour and ask for David. We learned so much about the city, the houses, murder most foul, all sorts of stuff I never knew before. I cannot recommend it enough.
I cannot say the same about the rooftop slide at Electric Moon.
My athleticism - even after multiple vodka sodas - is unmatched.
Anyway, are you ready for some Nightcaps? Pour yourself a culturally appropriating Cinco de Mayo margarita, and let's dive in.
The Met Gala never disappoints
Last night was the Met Gala. You know, the annual douche parade where celebrities deck themselves out in the most ridiculous costumes imaginable and circle jerk over how rich they are.
I love it.
The theme of the 2026 Met Gala was "Costume Art" with a dress code of "Fashion Is Art." Which feels pretty open-ended, if we're being honest.
Now, I don't pretend to know anything about high fashion. But it seems pretty clear to me that no matter what the theme of the night is, the celebrities are just going to wear whatever the heck they want anyway with absolutely no discernible cohesion. Or maybe I'm too much of a simple-minded peasant to understand.
Anyway, let's take a look at some of this year's show-stoppers, complete with my expert commentary.
Listen, this might be an unpopular opinion in OutKick-land, but I actually really like Angel Reese. I think she's beautiful, very savvy at marketing and branding, and when I interviewed her at All-Star Weekend in Indianapolis, she could not have been more kind.
That said, this dress looks like she just pulled the duvet off her hotel bed and tied it around her waist. Hair and makeup are on point, though.
Madonna rolled up with a whole model ship on her head.
I will give her credit, though, for actually taking the theme seriously. This look was supposed to emulate a 1945 painting by Leonora Carrington called "The Temptation of St. Anthony. Fragment II." And she pretty much nailed it.
However, Met Gala tickets reportedly cost $100,000 each this year. And I need to know whether Madonna was required to purchase one for each of the seven women she brought to hold her veil.
Rachel Zegler, what are you doing with your face?
No matter the theme, no matter the occasion. The Kardashian-Jenners do not miss an opportunity to wear a corset that squeezes their internal organs to their absolute limits.
I do love that Kylie probably told her team "Fashion is art? Find me an artwork that's naked!" RIP to her eyebrows, though.
A 6-year-old version of me would have lost her mind over a dress that blows bubbles.
Someone on Instagram said Cardi B's dress looked like hemorrhoids, and I can't unsee it.
OK this one was actually really cool! And I love that Sabrina didn't go full-on clown makeup like she usually does. (Yes, this is still a lot of makeup, but it's nowhere close to what she wears for shows.)
Anyway, here's some more.
And let's wrap this up with the queen of costumes, Heidi Klum. And yes, she took the theme seriously.
Haley Cavinder puts Jake Ferguson through Pilates hell
The Cavinder twins are athletes and Sports Illustrated swimsuit models. They have to keep their bodies in tip-top shape. And according to their social media, they do so through a combination of strength training, cardio and Pilates.
Speaking of Pilates, Haley Cavinder decided she was sick of her NFL fiancé, Jake Ferguson, not taking her workouts seriously. So she made him try Reformer Pilates. And he... struggled.
I've done plenty of Pilates in my life. And I can tell you that a Pilates studio would never allow someone to stand on the Reformer in their very first class. Major liability.
Still, 244-pound, 6-foot-5 Jake Ferguson might be able to run a 4.81-second 40-yard dash and jump 31.5 inches. But he clearly needs to work on his balance and flexibility.
And now maybe he'll stop giving Haley a hard time.
Skydiver suffers wardrobe malfunction
Before I went hang gliding for the first time last weekend, I asked my husband, "What do you think I'm supposed to wear for something like this?" He had no advice except that I should probably wear something with long sleeves because a) I'm always cold and b) it's probably a little chilly soaring through the air at 1,500 feet.
Turns out, this was great advice. I was shivering the whole time.
All of that to say there really is no specific hang gliding attire. There is, however, a suggested dress code for skydiving. And if you're a well-endowed woman, that includes one very important garment: a sports bra.
A 26-year-old woman named Chanell 't Zand learned that lesson the hard way.
Channell deployed the parachute AND the air bags.
I'll see myself out.
Mother's Day is upon us
Yes, ladies and gents, Mother's Day is this Sunday, May 10. So if you haven't already figured out what you're going to do to celebrate the special moms in your life, you'd best hop to it.
In case you missed it, last week I dropped my annual Womansplaining Mother's Day Gift Guide. It's a public service I offer every year.
Especially if you're a dad, this is your foolproof guide on how to make sure your wife has the perfect Mother's Day and to ensure you earn infinite brownie points.
THE ULTIMATE MOTHER'S DAY GAME PLAN FOR DADS WHO WANT TO KNOCK IT OUT OF THE PARK THIS YEAR
Just trust me, guys.
Do you share a bed with your dog?
I came across an interesting discussion on the Post Moves podcast (hosted by WNBA legend Candace Parker and Indiana Fever star Aliyah Boston) about whether dogs should be allowed to sleep with you in the bed. Candace and Aliyah both have dachshunds (although Candace mentioned she has two more dogs as well), and they answered with a resounding YES.
Now, I am a dog person through and through. If you've been reading my work for longer than five minutes, you know this about me. You probably also know I'm obsessed with my 2-year-old German shepherd, Rocky. So it might surprise you to find out that... no, my husband and I do not allow him on the bed.
My previous dog, a 45-pound mutt, was allowed on the bed. But an 80-pound heavy-shedding, can-barely-sit-still fur missile is a different story. Even with a king-size bed, that's a tight squeeze. We would get no sleep.
He is allowed on all other furniture, though, and he pretty much owns our sectional. So there's no need to cue up the sad Sarah McLachlan music for the poor guy.
Time to poll the community!
What's your call - is the dog allowed in the bed? Why or why not? Email me and let me know. I'll share some responses in next Tuesday's Nightcaps.
